There’s no other lifestyle quite like being an Oilfield wife. It’s a love/hate relationship. You love the oilfield….and hate it at the same time. I prefer to focus on the positives and the things I love. The pros of the oilfield definitely outweigh the cons. But there are some negatives, too. They are the things I usually ignore or try keep in the back of my mind. But without purposely sounding whiny or ungrateful, I thought I’d be brutally honest and list the things I dislike about the oilfield. So here’s the dirty little secrets, the “dark side” of the OF. I know a lot of it usually sounds fun and glamorous to non-oilfielders, and honestly I think a lot of my life is fun and glamorous….well…..fun anyway. But like all things, it has it’s good points and its bad points. Nothing is perfect, you just have to make the most out of it. We choose to focus on the good, but that doesn’t change the fact there are some negative parts, too. Here’s the 6 things that top the “bad” list…
1. I hate pity. I don’t want people to say, “Oh poor you, you won’t have your husband home on Christmas.” We’ve dealt with it, they need to, too. We chose this lifestyle, we can handle it. It’s one thing to just be nice or generally concerned, it’s another thing to pity. Please don’t feel sorry for us, we are OK.
2. I hate the danger factor. I get callused to it, or at least I don’t constantly worry. I think I choose to not think about it, but then when there’s an explosion like there was a few months ago up at the north slope (thankfully no one was hurt) it becomes all too real again - it is dangerous. So many things can go wrong. It is definitely one of the more dangerous careers out there, and that is scary. It’s something I do not want to think about.
3. I hate that there’s a built-in stereo type that comes with being an oilfield wife. Either you are labeled as trash, or (more commonly up here in AK) you are labeled as wealthy. Neither is true. I am proud to be an oilfield wife, but please get to know me before you make assumptions on what that means.
4. I hate hate hate driving to the airport in bad weather. I am a nervous wreck by the time we get there if I have to drive to Anchorage in the snow. Thankfully I haven’t had to do it yet this winter- we try to work around it. My husband usually carpools or drives himself and parks in long term parking, and he’s even taken taxis when necessary. Of course I do it if there are no other options, but honestly it ranks right up there with having a root canal.
5. I hate that there’s always some insecurity with the job. We think we are stable, we have a good income, and have a little put away….but what if? The Alaskan north slope started as a 20-year field……35 years ago. What happens if it all shuts down? My husband is experienced and has a great resume, but there’s no guarantee he could find another job. You NEVER know what tomorrow holds.
6. I hate when I’m lonely. I am tough, but yes, it does get lonely. When I’m wishing my husband was home, I feel weak and I hate that. I also hate when he’s home and I think it might be easier if he was gone, that makes me feel guilty. I don’t like feeling needy or guilty.
There it is all out in the open, the less than appealing aspects of the oilfield. I don’t want to make anyone think negatively or persuade anyone in anyway – - I just want to be realistic. I’m usually cheerfully optimistic while singing the praises of the oilfield, so I thought it only fair to look at the negatives, too.
What are your biggest fears, dislikes, and/or pet peeves about being a ROW?
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