It was her husband’s dying wish to get the house sold. That was why I sat and talked with a woman whose husband was dying of cancer in the other room. One of the things they had talked about as his health turned south was his desire for her to be free from the responsibilities of their large home after his passing. He urged her to call a REALTOR, so there I was. At her kitchen table she was overwhelmed with emotion. Who could blame her? I felt silly going over marketing or numbers, it wasn’t the right time, and she wasn’t at a place where she could listen to it emotionally. I held her hand and asked if I could pray with her instead. I asked her if she had support or a church home. She didn’t. I told her I would get her some help, if she was okay with it.
I left the house with tears rolling down my face because her pain was palpable. I called my church and spoke with our care and counseling pastor. I passed along her phone number and that was the end.
In the months that followed, I would call her to see how she was. Each time I would call her, she would say, “Even though he died, I’m not ready to sell my house” and each time I would say, “that is not why I’m calling.” I had felt her pain that day and for whatever reason was compelled to check in with her from time to time. A few months later, she called me. She was ready to list her home. Through the course of working with her, one day she mentioned something that totally took me by surprise. She told me that she didn’t know how she would have gotten through the last few months without me. Me? What did I even do? I sat with her for a few minutes several months prior and had a few uncomfortable phone conversations. How was that helpful for her? She went on to stress how much the church contact had helped her. He was able to tell her about Grief Share, a support group for those that have lost a loved one. She did not know how she would have coped with her husband’s death without the support and love from Grief Share. It was then that I remembered I had called the church and given them her phone number. I had no idea what the outcome had been and had forgotten about it. I was a little bit stunned to be honest. I made one phone call. It took 3 minutes. It impacted her life in ways that I would never have imagined. What I had done was not difficult or flashy, but it made a huge difference in her life.
We often hear things like, “Go BIG or go HOME!!” Do it up larger than life and if you can’t do that, just go give up, because it won’t matter. In the age of social media, sometimes we don’t think what we are doing is relevant or important unless it has hundreds of likes or shares. We may feel like what we are doing doesn’t mean anything unless the whole world knows and approves.
We can’t all be famous. We can’t all be in the spotlight. There are people doing amazing things on a global scale and it is awe-inspiring. For the majority of us, we may not ever have the opportunity to impact the world at that level. I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to be a celebrity to help others in a meaningful way. We each can make a difference in our own communities and most of the time, we won’t’ even know that it happened. The thing that took just a few minutes out of your day that you have already forgotten about, may have just changed someone’s outlook on life.
I share this story because many times we do small things for others. We as women take care of our families and many people around us. We may not hear or see the fruits of our love. Just because we can’t see it, doesn’t mean that it isn’t there. How often have each of us done a small thing for someone and never seen that person again? I believe in most cases, we will never know how our small acts had a huge impact in someone’s life. What we think is small and meaningless, is larger than life to someone else.
Don’t discount what you are doing. Don’t believe for one second that what you do doesn’t matter. It does. We each have the ability to do amazing things for other people. Just because it seems small to us, doesn’t mean that it is. I believe that life is about our relationships with others. Some of us may have the opportunity to feed thousands of people. Some of us may travel the world making it a better place. Most of us will do less glamorous things like volunteering at our children’s school or opening the door for someone who can’t. We may never know how extra smiles, hugs, and helpfulness can transform another’s life.
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